Who am I?

Photo by Brooke Cagle on Unsplash

A good question, right? 😊 I don't like to keep a written piece impersonal. In videos, it's always easy to get to know a person at least visually. Mimics, body language, smiles - it's understandable even if you don't say a word. With texts, it's of course different. So even if you don't check out my channel (such a tip, lol), you can get to know me here.

So what brings me in the world of ASMR? Wait, do you know what ASMR is? If not, go here, get your earphones ready and explore. If yes, read on.

I discovered ASMR videos by pure chance. I watched a couple of massage videos and thought: "Hm, a good skill to learn. Let me... Wait!" And then I stumbled upon The Tingles. It was an ASMR video suggested, and I realized it was something I've known for a while and yes, it has a name! It's a sweetest discovery that people can go through. You feel something, but you don't entirely know what that is; and then you run into a full world of this and people understand you and they are like you and... It's a wonderful feeling. Kind of belonging.

It took me a year to try and make my own ASMR videos. At first, it was horrible. I published one video without showing my face and it was pretty trivial (bad lighting, bad camera, bad sound). There are thousands of videos like this on the net. However, it was the first try, and it was a big step. I was scared to go on though and started a real channel another year later. I got a Blue Yeti microphone then, so I was at least sure in the sound.

When I watch my first videos now (I don't do it for more than a couple of seconds, I hate watching myself!), I'm like: wow, are these my cheeks? Wow, I was so non-smiley and grumpy and serious and afraid of the camera. And this hair, look at this short boring hair! Well, I guess it's a common problem: being critical about yourself 😂

Now it's been 2 years since I started my channel. I had two, actually. The new one is one year old but I re-uploaded all the old videos from the first one, so it's like the only one. The first channel fell victim to a scam network that didn't want to pay me any ad revenue. I couldn't get out, so I had to shut down the channel and move to another one. I had 3 000 subs at that time, and I knew I wouldn't see all of them on the new channel. Then a cute little miracle happened.

I was about to stop doing ASMR at all: I hated my bulky equipment that I had to move all around the room to set up and then move away (a living room is not a recording studio, you know, it has other purposes to serve 😂), I didn't enjoy filming at all ( at the moment, I wasn't happy with the quality) and the network issue was the final shot. I ended up with a handful of subs and nobody cared. Not really!

A large ASMR channel contacted me (ASMR Massage Psychetruth) and they were super sweet to offer a shoutout for free. Just because they heard about my network issue, they liked me and saw a potential in what I do. Wow! I was super excited! So they mentioned me in one of their videos, and my sub count was back to what I had before moving. Wow again!

This helped me not to stop. They gave me a few tips that I would suggest to anyone starting their own channel: be consistent, post 2-3 times a week (well, at least a stable 1 time) at ~same time. This is what YouTube likes: consistency. It looks serious and determined for its algorithms. And I faced it next winter when I thought: well, I want a Christmas holiday too, so no videos for a couple of weeks, it's okay, nothing's gonna happen. Well, it wasn't true.

My views and sub count (I'm not even talking about the ad revenue) fell to an extent that even when I restarted posting consistently, I struggled for 3 weeks to get a positive sub count. I kept uploading and kept getting negative subs. It's no secret that out of all subscribers/month you get 1/3 of unsibscribers. It's okay. People leave for different reasons, and channel quality may have nothing to do with it. However, what I faced was even more severe. I felt desperate! I was doing my best, my new microphone was amazing (SR3D, to be precise; I will do a separate post on the tech stuff later), my lighting was top-notch, everything was fine, but not the subs. That's what happened thanks to the New Year gap in uploading. Don't do it! Don't stop uploading if you want your channel to grow. Don't do gaps. Post at least an excuse video, anything. Just go on.

Then it gradually went up. Persistence, that's what helped. Aaaand then I discovered a trend everybody seemed to be crazy about: ear eating. I didn't do any mouth sounds/eating/or any misophonic-nightmare-kind-of-videos. Also, I was pretty sure it's inappropriate. It took me a couple of weeks to make up my mind and do an ear eating video that simply blew my sub and view count. I got 5 000 subs in 3 weeks and 200 000 views on my twin ear eating video. It was awesome!

I'm anyways a little cautious about these videos. I wouldn't want my employer to see me doing this. I wouldn't want my close friends to see me doing this. I still keep my channel in a kind of a secrety state. I'm not ashamed; it's just that people need to know what ASMR is to react accordingly. I don't want to see those huge eyes and questions like "Is it porn?" I like the community that knows what's it all about. Other people wouldn't want to rush into the theme without a small introduction. That's it.

Now my channel is at around 12 000 subs. I put quite a lot of time, effort and love in the videos in a hope to help at least some people who struggle with sleep or anxiety, or those who just love tingles. 😊

I know, the post turned out to be more of "My ASMR story", but... anyways. It's an ASMR blog, so... 😊